When one does something wrong to the other, the victim is often left in a state of anger. Out of this anger, he may take revenge on the wrong-doer to make him learn a lesson. But does taking revenge really make the wrong right? The truth is revenge and teaching the other a lesson are completely different things.
Revenge is an act done out of anger, as a way to satisfy it. When we are angry, we normally expect a shameful sorry from the wrong-doer. If we don't get that, we feel like being violent due to a sudden release of energy within. This energy is born out of anger and to let it go, we take revenge. Once one takes revenge, it doesn't make the wrong-doer learn a lesson. If you take revenge on someone, he is sure to realize you are doing wrong to him out of anger ~ normally when we take revenge, we do wrong to wrong following the ideology ~ 'doing wrong unto wrong is not wrong.' But as the wrong doer doesn't realize his own action as wrong, he just sees it as you doing wrong to him. Seeing this, he will get angry and take more revenge on you. Seeing revenge on revenge, you will feel like taking more revenge.... and the cycle keeps going on, creating enmity between the both of you and also a feeling of dissatisfaction because you couldn't take as much revenge as you wanted.
Anger is capable of paralyzing our ability to think, that's why the action of revenge takes place. Sometimes, while we are taking revenge, the wrong one realizes his or her mistake, and tries to apologize, but because of this state of anger we don't realize the apology and carry on taking revenge. Then the wrong one ~ who has apologized ~ will get angry seeing this 'revenge even after apologies' and take revenge on his behalf. Then because you are still angry, you will see this revenge as 'revenge on revenge,' and then get more angry and take more revenge, leading to another enmity-creating cycle. Phew! Revenge sure does cause a lot of problems. When you take revenge, you might find yourself in either one of three situations.
One is where the person you want to take revenge on is less powerful than you. This situation may seem to be to your advantage and you might take revenge easily by letting your anger controlling everything. Taking revenge in this situation does give satisfaction. This revenge might teach the wrong-one a lesson, as the wrong-one takes into consideration that you are more powerful (or of greater authority than him), that is unless he is more convinced that you yourself is the one who has done wrong.
The other situation is when the person you want to take revenge on is just as powerful as you. Taking revenge is not as easy and it might trigger a chain reaction. You may or may not feel satisfied by taking revenge as in this scenario, your anger meets a few limits.
The third situation is where the person you want to take revenge on is more powerful than you. You might feel helpless taking revenge on that person and it is sure to make things worse for you. Your anger in this situation is totally trapped within boundaries and is sure to lead you to dissatisfaction.
When you teach the wrong-doer a lesson, it can be done peacefully, or violently ~ of which doing it peacefully is more advisable. As one takes revenge, he might say that he's gonna punish the guy. The purpose behind punishing is to make the wrong get a taste of their own evil, so on tasting it, they won't do it again. But if you do this with even a pinch of anger, it can make matters worse. When you teach him a lesson, you do it with an intention that he will realize his mistake and with an expectation that he will probably say sorry ~ a shameful sorry . A by-product of that ~ if you do it properly ~ is that he won't do the same mistake again. It's surely better to teach the wrong-doer a lesson ~ an act done after thinking consciously ~ than taking revenge ~ an act done out of anger (unconsciously). Before doing anything of the such, it is necessary to think a bit before you react so as to make sure the wrong-one will learn a lesson, otherwise revenge and ignorance won't be too far away.
So what do you do when you want to take revenge? When you are real angry on someone ready to take merciless revenge, 'pause' yourself and think. What action has the other done that has made you angry? Then examine that action. Is it wrong? Has it been triggered by you? If yes, then you have yourself to blame and you should learn to not do such an action again in such a situation in the future. If no, then think of how you can make the the wrong-doer realize his mistake and make him not do it again. There is one saying you can follow while making your plan, every person has a good side and a bad side. When someone does wrong, he does it out of the thought of his bad side. All you have to do is ignite his good side and let it manifest the bad one, making him regret his mistake. After you are sure your plan of teaching the other a lesson will work, implement it. If it doesn't work, learn from your failure and make a better plan. Remember, igniting something isn't just as easy as flicking the switch on the lighter, it has to be done manually by blowing very gently on the embers. Doing all this might take some time and of course self-control, but it is totally worth it rather than to take revenge.
Revenge is an act done out of anger, as a way to satisfy it. When we are angry, we normally expect a shameful sorry from the wrong-doer. If we don't get that, we feel like being violent due to a sudden release of energy within. This energy is born out of anger and to let it go, we take revenge. Once one takes revenge, it doesn't make the wrong-doer learn a lesson. If you take revenge on someone, he is sure to realize you are doing wrong to him out of anger ~ normally when we take revenge, we do wrong to wrong following the ideology ~ 'doing wrong unto wrong is not wrong.' But as the wrong doer doesn't realize his own action as wrong, he just sees it as you doing wrong to him. Seeing this, he will get angry and take more revenge on you. Seeing revenge on revenge, you will feel like taking more revenge.... and the cycle keeps going on, creating enmity between the both of you and also a feeling of dissatisfaction because you couldn't take as much revenge as you wanted.
Anger is capable of paralyzing our ability to think, that's why the action of revenge takes place. Sometimes, while we are taking revenge, the wrong one realizes his or her mistake, and tries to apologize, but because of this state of anger we don't realize the apology and carry on taking revenge. Then the wrong one ~ who has apologized ~ will get angry seeing this 'revenge even after apologies' and take revenge on his behalf. Then because you are still angry, you will see this revenge as 'revenge on revenge,' and then get more angry and take more revenge, leading to another enmity-creating cycle. Phew! Revenge sure does cause a lot of problems. When you take revenge, you might find yourself in either one of three situations.
One is where the person you want to take revenge on is less powerful than you. This situation may seem to be to your advantage and you might take revenge easily by letting your anger controlling everything. Taking revenge in this situation does give satisfaction. This revenge might teach the wrong-one a lesson, as the wrong-one takes into consideration that you are more powerful (or of greater authority than him), that is unless he is more convinced that you yourself is the one who has done wrong.
The other situation is when the person you want to take revenge on is just as powerful as you. Taking revenge is not as easy and it might trigger a chain reaction. You may or may not feel satisfied by taking revenge as in this scenario, your anger meets a few limits.
The third situation is where the person you want to take revenge on is more powerful than you. You might feel helpless taking revenge on that person and it is sure to make things worse for you. Your anger in this situation is totally trapped within boundaries and is sure to lead you to dissatisfaction.
When you teach the wrong-doer a lesson, it can be done peacefully, or violently ~ of which doing it peacefully is more advisable. As one takes revenge, he might say that he's gonna punish the guy. The purpose behind punishing is to make the wrong get a taste of their own evil, so on tasting it, they won't do it again. But if you do this with even a pinch of anger, it can make matters worse. When you teach him a lesson, you do it with an intention that he will realize his mistake and with an expectation that he will probably say sorry ~ a shameful sorry . A by-product of that ~ if you do it properly ~ is that he won't do the same mistake again. It's surely better to teach the wrong-doer a lesson ~ an act done after thinking consciously ~ than taking revenge ~ an act done out of anger (unconsciously). Before doing anything of the such, it is necessary to think a bit before you react so as to make sure the wrong-one will learn a lesson, otherwise revenge and ignorance won't be too far away.
So what do you do when you want to take revenge? When you are real angry on someone ready to take merciless revenge, 'pause' yourself and think. What action has the other done that has made you angry? Then examine that action. Is it wrong? Has it been triggered by you? If yes, then you have yourself to blame and you should learn to not do such an action again in such a situation in the future. If no, then think of how you can make the the wrong-doer realize his mistake and make him not do it again. There is one saying you can follow while making your plan, every person has a good side and a bad side. When someone does wrong, he does it out of the thought of his bad side. All you have to do is ignite his good side and let it manifest the bad one, making him regret his mistake. After you are sure your plan of teaching the other a lesson will work, implement it. If it doesn't work, learn from your failure and make a better plan. Remember, igniting something isn't just as easy as flicking the switch on the lighter, it has to be done manually by blowing very gently on the embers. Doing all this might take some time and of course self-control, but it is totally worth it rather than to take revenge.
